The Southern Poverty Law, commonly known as the SPLC, center should probably be renamed Southerners Piling up Large Currency. The organization, which Fox News host Tucker Carlson has called “totally fake,” has stashed approximately four million dollars in offshore accounts located in the Cayman Islands, the British Virgin Islands and Bermuda. It’s totally understandable when legitimate charitable organizations invest donations in order to maximize the good they can do. But it is a bit bizarre for a charitable organization that is supposed to be tax-exempt and non-profit to go squirreling away money in Caribbean tax havens.

What is the SPLC up to? Who knows. But it kind of looks like they might actually be Southerners who Protect Lawless Cash. According to the Washington Times the organization has $328 million in net assets and raised more than $50 million in contributions in 2015. They also appear to keep seven years’ assets in reserve.

In reserve for what? That’s not really clear. The SPLC is supposedly dedicated to providing legal services to the poor. However, it doesn’t appear to have spent very much lately on eradicating poverty. They do have a very jazzy website with an interactive hate map. The hate map is wildly inaccurate but, judging by all the pretty colors, it probably cost a lot to put up and maintain.

Here’s an idea how the SPLC could spend some of the huge amounts of cash it apparently keeps lying around for a rainy day: Since so much of the money is located in the Caribbean, which just got socked by Hurricane Irma, maybe the SPLC could spend some of it helping the storm victims in Barbuda, Turks and Caicos and the Virgin Islands. Donald Trump donated a million dollars to the victims of Hurricane Harvey, you’d think the SPLC wouldn’t want to be outdone by such a big ol’ hateful meanie!

Of course, one wonders, if the Internal Revenue Service started harassing the SPLC the way it did the Tea Party and other conservative organizations, would the SPLC suddenly turn into Southerners Preferring to Leave the Country? Who knows? But with that kind of coin, the SPLC can definitely buy better legal services than it is providing to the poor of the United States.

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